More Ponderings ...

In trying to understand the perspective that "disruption is inherently wrong", I have a couple of questions ...

If a sibling group is in an orphanage or foster care, and it is known that one child has consistently/repeatedly injured/abused one or more of their siblings ... should the sibling group stay together because "they're siblings"?


If a family brings home a sibling group and immediately discovers that abuse is taking place within the sibling group ... should the sibling group stay together because "they're siblings"?


If you believe that it would be okay to separate siblings in either of these instances ... than at what point does it become wrong to separate a sibling group?


I personally know a family that brought home a sibling group through foster care.  It was quickly discovered that s*xual abuse was taking place in the home, by the oldest sibling.  The family desperately wanted to adopt the younger siblings, but the state determined that "siblings stay together".  I absolutely believe that this  was wrong ... that the siblings should NOT have been kept together.  That, rather than throwing all of the siblings back "into the system", that the younger ones should have been allowed to stay with the wonderful loving family that wanted to adopt them.  



I personally know another family who had brought home a sibling group through foster care.  Both siblings had been previously abused (s*xually) in their bio. home and in another foster home.  And, the siblings were acting out s*xually towards one another.  In that situation ... the state determined that separating the siblings would be best ... which I agreed with.


I have been in contact with another family, who chose to keep their troubled adopted son in their home, and now they are dealing with the trauma of their mentally handicapped daughter being pregnant.  Yes, their adopted son s*xually abused their adopted disabled daughter.  In this case, is it "okay" to disrupt an adoption ... or do they need to keep their son at home, with the fear that he will impregnate more of their daughters?


You cannot imagine  ...

...  the stories that have been shared with me,
since I first started writing about our CRISIS.

... the heartfelt cries of the mamas that have emailed me,
when they have nowhere else to turn.

... the pain and trauma that families are walking through
because they have been told "disruption is wrong".


If so ... if it is wrong to disrupt an adoption ... than what is the answer for these families ???


One commenter likened an Adoption Disruption to Divorce.  They said they would do whatever it took to keep their family together.  At first, I didn't see the similarities.  While I could imagine the Disruption, I couldn't imagine a Divorce.  However, now I think I do.  If my husband was physically or s*xually abusing me or my children ... I would "disrupt" the marriage.  I would not keep my husband in my home, with "boundaries" set up.  I would not just tell him, "Don't have s*x with your daughters."  I would not just put an alarm on his bedroom door, nor tell him to stay within my eyesight at all times.  No ... I would tell him to go find another place to live.  I would not allow the possibility of the abuse to continue happening in my home.


Now ... after 27 years of marriage to the most amazing husband and Papa ever, I cannot even fathom any of the above taking place.  But ... if I knew someone who's husband was physically or s*xually abusing them ... I would tell them to "get out now".  Yes ... I would.

No, God does not like divorce.
God wants marriages to be "forever".
But, God also does not like abuse.
God wants us to protect ourselves and our children.

No, God does not like adoption disruptions.
God wants families to stay together "forever".
But, God also does not like abuse.
God wants us to protect our children.

A Different Perspective

Sarah has a different perspective on Adoption Disruption.  If you're still pondering the whole topic, you might want to consider her thoughts.  She also gives a very detailed list of things that parents should do to lesson the possibility of even having to consider a disruption  ... a list of things to do before they adopt, to ensure that they are prepared.

While Sarah and I may not agree on all aspects of this most difficult situation, I sincerely appreciate her well-thought-out post and her approach.  Thanks, Sarah, for not placing judgement upon those of us making these difficult decisions.

What Are You Thinking?

I don't check my blog counter very often ... not every day or every week. However, I just checked it and I see that more people visited my blog yesterday than I have ever seen ... in over a year with a blog counter.

I find this quite curious, because there have been very few comments on my last 3 posts (posted Thursday night and Friday).

Have I offended you? If so, that was certainly not my intent.

I would really like to hear your responses to the last 3 posts.

But, maybe, the comments are silent ...

because you are all feeling that I should have just kept silent ...

What Is A Disrupted Adoption?

Corey has already received 223 comments on THIS POST ... which I posted (below) earlier today.

I would like to share with you a couple of the comments she has received ...

While most of the comments are supportive and positive, there are always those who have no idea of the further pain that can be cause by their words.

"So. I'm curious. If you love your son, why do you post him needing a home like you'd post a stray dog needing a home?"

Yes. That is how some people look at those of us who are walking through the trauma of a "disrupted adoption" (which is the term most commonly used when a family must find a new family for an adopted child). When I had to write the post for the CHASK website, looking for a new home for my son, that is how I felt. I felt like I was writing a "classified ad" for my son. But ... I had no other resources ... no other way that I knew of to find a new family for my son. Our pastor had thought that there should be a family within our large church (with 2,000+ attendees) that could take Jacob. But, no family was found. What else were we to do? We had nowhere to turn. No agency to work with. No adoption support system. I was all alone ... writing my classified ad. Please don't judge me for doing the only thing I knew to do. Please don't judge Corey for writing this on her blog.

And, another ...

"Disruption? So is that what adoptive parents call it to justify the giveaway? Hey, I have a seriously disabled child and she is certainly "disruptive" but I am not giving her away. What a cop out phrase."

Nope. I don't like the phrase either. But, that is what it is commonly called. If you've read Corey's story ... if you've read about our CRISIS ... you should know that neither family is looking for the "easy way out". Neither of us are "copping out" on our parenting responsibilities. But, we are each responsible for several younger children as well. Should we cop out on our responsibilities to them, in order to keep our sons in our homes?

There was another comment, though, that had a pro-active response to the phrase "disrupted adoption" ...

"... when a birth mother places a child for adoption - for whatever reason - the appropriate language is "adoption plan" or "adoption placement" as it is understood that the birth mother loves the child and is making the decision/plan/placement out of love. I find it fascinating and judgmental that when an adoptive family finds themselves in the position that they need to make an adoption plan it is called a "disruption" as though adoptive families do not love their children enough to make a loving "adoption plan" for them, but just easily "disrupt" their child's place in the family. It is certainly not like that at all and the term "disruption" itself once again shows that adoptive moms are judged more critically and their authenticity as a mom is given less credence than biological mothers."

Yes. I like that. Corey and I are working on loving "adoption placement plans" for our sons.

A Young Boy ... In Need of A Family

I came across a blog post today, that truly touched my heart in many ways.

I emailed this mom, and got her permission to reprint her post on my blog.

I am posting her story for two reasons:

#1 Maybe you or someone you know will be just the right family for this little boy.

#2 Maybe, by reading Corey's story, you will have a little more understanding of the CRISIS situation that our family has walked through these past 4 months. When I have so often felt misunderstood in our CRISIS ... maybe Corey's words will speak her heart better than I have tried to speak my heart. So much of our situation is similar ... especially the pain of a Mama's heart, when an adoption doesn't turn out as she has dreamed, planned, and prayed for.

THIS POST is written by Corey ...

at Watching The Waters.

This is a hard post to write, because I don’t want to talk about it, because I don’t want to open us up to attack, and partly because I just don’t want this to be my life.

We need to find a new home for our son, AngryBoy.

I know there are many people out there who do not understand disruption, and to them I say, I am so happy for you. I am relieved that you have never known the agony that the last two years has been for our family, and I pray that you never will. There was a time when I, too, may have been judgmental of diruption. Now I know that it is possible to go to that decision kicking and screaming, but with no other options.

Five years ago, I saw a picture of this little boy, and I fell in love.

I didn’t know much about him. I knew how old he was, that he had a sister 2 years older, and a baby brother. I knew that he was picked on in his orphanage; that the other kids, and sometimes adults, called him “gwo tet” (big head), that he sometimes had angry fits about this, and that a new nanny had taken him under her wing. I knew that we had just brought home a child from Haiti, that we were in the middle of another adoption, that we lived in a 3 bedroom townhouse and drove a Toyota Corolla, and lived on one income, and that no one we knew had SIX CHILDREN. But I felt, strongly, that God wanted us to adopt this child. Eventually, we did.

We took several trips to Haiti to meet him and spend time with him and his siblings.

He came home at age 5. Of all of our kids, I would have said that he had the easiest homecoming. He was sweet. He was affectionate with us. He looked to us for approval. He was a good boy. Sure, there were some odd things. He preferred to spend time with adults rather than with kids. He’d rather work than play. He seemed to have quite a bit of anxiety. He’d laugh when one of the other kids got hurt. But none of it raised red flags… a lot of it was orphanage behavior, some was Haitian culture. Then one day, when the kids were playing “mom and dad”.. something transpired, and we learned that our boy had endured terrible things in his early life.

We did all the things we were advised to do. We educated the heck out of our kids. We roleplayed. We rehearsed. We did not get AngryBoy therapy (because he didn’t even speak English yet). We hoped that the change from a Third World orphanage to a loving, supportive family was enough. We had baby monitors everywhere. We supervised our kids more than the average bear. We did not do sleepovers. But. AngryBoy’s issues were not first and foremost in our minds. Vivi clearly had attachment issues, and we needed to be careful who we roomed her with. We needed to decrease her parentification with AngryBoy, and be wary of the artificial twinning/competition issues with Tina. We were co-sleeping with BabyBoy, who had been in the orphanage since he was 6 months old. WildGirl had multiple surgeries, major separation anxiety, and had frightening rages. Over time, AngryBoy seemed to be doing okay.

Until Halloween, 2 years ago. When we discovered that not only were things NOT.OKAY, but that terrible, horrible, no-good, very-bad things had happened, had been happening, for months, and that we needed to call Child & Youth on our 6 year old son.

I cannot tell you how terrifying that weekend was for us. I was so scared that they were going to come in and take our son away… my baby! All I could think was that he had never even slept away from home before. He didn’t know he had done anything wrong. He had only done what had been done to him. He was SIX. And then, I was terrified that they would take my other children.. because I had failed to protect them. I was so, so angry. I was nauseous. I couldn’t stop crying. Somehow, by the grace of God, we got through it. Somehow, all of our kids stayed.

But things changed. AngryBoy moved to a different floor of the house, and he was never, never unsupervised. He morphed from my sweet, good boy into AngryBoy. Or maybe that sweet, good boy had only been maintaining because he had an outlet. Or, or, or, I don’t know. When everything you KNOW to be true is turned inside out and backward, it is so hard to get your feet under you again and trust your judgment. All I know is that this is the point where this blog really started, the point where I couldn’t ever find my boy, and I couldn’t ever find help for my boy, and no matter what I did, I couldn’t ever, ever help my boy.

I have fought my ass off to get help for my son. I took him to psychologists and psychiatrists, I brought him to a psychiatric hospital, to inpatient programs and outpatient programs. I put him in special school programs. I worked the system to get him into what I think is the best residential treatment facility in the country for young kids with issues like his. And I work like a dog to keep him there, pushing the boundaries with my insurance company and with Medicaid and, I’ll tell you what, the Governor’s office knows me by name.

But the reality is, my boy cannot come home. He cannot. And it is not because I am angry with him, or because I hate him, or because I refuse to make it work. I am a mother of six children. And I cannot bring my son back to live in the house where he has hurt my daughters. I just cannot. If he was an only child.. it would be a different story. But… it is what it is. This is the new motto of our lives. Some things cannot be changed. Some things just are.

AngryBoy is currently 8 years old. He has been in residential treatment for almost 10 months, and likely will be for several months more, which would allow a family to work with the therapy team to transition him into a new home. The team does an excellent job when a child comes home of coming to your community and working with you AND anyone and everyone the child will be working with (school, church, respite) to train them in continuing with their program for maximum success. Our son’s diagnoses include RAD, PTSD, and oppositional defiance disorder. There’s some debate about whether or not he has ADHD.. whether he does or not, meds seem to help him slow down and make better choices. He also takes some meds to help him sleep.

He likes basketball, and he likes to do jigsaw puzzles.. the bigger and more complicated, the better. He likes school, and is proud of his reading and math abilities. He works pretty consistently at a second grade level. I would imagine he will need an alternate school setting, or a 504 plan that includes 1:1 supervision. We would insist that he be in a family that has pretty serious RAD experience. I think even for families that have dealt with RAD previously, our boy may be a challenge. He does well with a strong routine and strict limits. I *do* 110% believe that he has the capability of forming attachments. He is slow to trust, he will test you beyond belief, but he can attach. It is much, much easier for him to attach to men than to women. I think he would have to be in a family with at least one male parent.. we’re not opposed to a 2 Dad family, either. He might do okay in a large family if he was the youngest (physically, mentally, and emotionally.. there must be no one for him to victimize; this is still a concern). My husband needs to be able to maintain contact.. as much as his therapist says is appropriate. Also, because we have his biological siblings, we need that door to remain open somewhat, for whatever level is mutually beneficial.

It has taken us two painful years to come to this point. I know some of you will judge us harshly for it. That’s ok. There is nothing that you can say that we haven’t said to ourselves, and to each other. We have considered every option, including divorcing and maintaining 2 households. We’re doing what we have to do. No one else has to understand it. No one else has to bless it. I can’t say that we’ve come to peace with it.. how does one do that?.. but it’s time. I don’t want our boy to come out of residential treatment and go into foster care, because there’s no place for him to go. I don’t want him to grow up in a group home. He needs a family.

My prayer is that this post gets to where it needs to go. Maybe you know someone. Maybe you know someone who knows someone. Maybe you know someone who disrupted had to disrupt and they have some suggestions about how to proceed, who to talk to, how to do this without ripping your guts out. Scratch that. It should feel like ripping your guts out. No matter what, it’s still losing a baby.

Thanks, Corey ...

... for sharing your story .

.. for sharing your heart!

While the details differ, our story is the same in so many ways. A family brought home a son from another country, fully intending to become his Forever Family. But, unbeknownst to the family, this precious child had experienced the unthinkable ... and had followed the behavior patterns that had been "taught" through the abuse. Sadly, this situation created an unsafe living environment for other children in the home. While this Mama and Papa love their child dearly, they KNOW that it is best if he not return to their home. If you have never faced such a situation/decision ... you have absolutely no idea how gut-wrenchingly difficult it is. No idea. Nothing compares.

Why Are We Told To "Keep Silent" About Our CRISIS?

I received an email today, from someone that found my blog yesterday. She wrote to tell me how much she appreciated my openness and honesty about our CRISIS situation (see archives). I'd like to share a bit of her personal note to me ...

"I don't know what got into me last night, but I read through your blog from March until now. I found your blog because of a comment you left on another blog, about a family going through a disruption. We are in the process of adopting a foster child who (was in a previously disrupted adoption). The disruption was the best thing that could ever have happened to everyone involved. ... If disruption happens for your family, I know God will take care of Jacob and everyone involved. Something I learned early on in the foster care process was that God loves these kids more than I ever could, and wants the best for them. I hold on tight to that every day!

Your blog has inspired me to open up more again. We had a blog previously, that was open, without divulging names and details. But, someone who knew us in real life hacked into my blog and said some horrid things and hurt me. So, I closed that blog down. After a time, I opened a new one, but haven't felt comfortable sharing hardly any details because I fear the backlash.

After reading your blog, I realized that Satan has tried to silence my voice and silence our story; and I will no longer allow that. So, thank you for being open and honest."

I was BLESSED by this email, as

I have felt especially alone lately.

When most Christians face a CRISIS in their lives,

they are surrounded by other Believers who are there ...

... to encourage

... to pray with

... to support the family

However, this CRISIS has been different for us.

Rather than being surrounded by those that love us,

we have been pushed away.

Our situation is something that ...

... no one wants to know about.

... no one wants to talk about.

... others wish we would

have kept quiet about.

... has brought on ungodly

and ugly gossip about our family.

Yet, I believe that ...

... Satan wants to silence

those of us in adoption CRISIS.

... Satan doesn't want Believers to

walk together through CRISIS such as ours.

... Satan wants us to be hurt and alone,

in our deepest time of need.

It's time ...

... for Believers to be HONEST

about the challenges that adoption can bring.

... for Believers to come together and SUPPORT

each other in times of CRISIS.

... for Believers to stop judging each other.

... for Believers to stop gossiping about each other.

... for Believers to stand together and NOT

allow Satan to have his way in our worlds.

When I read the Scriptures,

I DON'T find Jesus ...

... telling people to "Keep Quiet"

about their problems.

... gossiping with His friends.

... laughing and judging those in CRISIS.

... talking behind others' backs.

No ... this is NOT the Jesus that I know.

This is NOT the response to CRISIS

that Jesus calls us to have.

Despite the loneliness and pain of rejection ...

... I will NOT keep silent.

... I will NOT pretend that everything is wonderful

behind the closed doors of our home.

... I will NOT judge others who are walking

through the same CRISIS, or a crisis of another kind.

How about you?

Which way have you chosen to respond ...

to those of us in CRISIS?

Beautiful Oregon

We had the most beautiful drive on Monday. It was nice to get off the Interstate, and wind our way through the countryside.

Carissa borrowed my camera, and took these while we were driving 55 mph down the highway.

For those of you who have never visited the Pacific NW ... Washington, Oregon, and Idaho are filled with scenes that look like this. They are beautiful states year 'round, but the fall colors added even more beauty.

Let me know if you want to come visit our corner of the country. We would LOVE to host other bloggers who are on family road trips ... especially once we move to our amazing island. It is BEAUTIFUL!!!

Details of The Tent Trailer

Several people have asked for details about our Tent Trailer. So, here is a quick post about our wonderful trailer. Despite our Tire Explosion, we still LOVE our little trailer and plan to use it for many more Road Trips.

We were tent campers until just a few years ago, when we made the big step up to the trailer. Here are a few of the things we prefer about trailer camping rather than tent camping:

1. It's much more comfortable.

2. We can pack some of our belongings in the trailer,

especially our BIG cooler, so not everything has to fit in the van.

3. It's a much quicker set up and take down than our big 10 x 20 tent that we used to use.

4. We stay much drier in rain storms.

5. We feel safer in wind storms.

6. We can cook inside, in case of storms (or monster bugs in TX).

But, we also have the option of cooking outside (as there is a gas stove top that attaches to the outside wall).

7. We LOVE having the electric lights at night (and the outlets for our computers).

So, here are a few pics from our trip ...

The Trailer

The Table ... where we use our computers.

(which folds into a bed for a little one to sleep)

The Stove Top and Sink

The Refrigerator and Counter Space

3 or 4 kids can sleep on this King Size Bed

Mama and 2 little ones sleep on this King Size Bed

Now, of course, a Motor Home would be even easier, drier, and safer in storms. But ... we still prefer our trailer.

Our trailer doesn't use as much gas as a motor home. In fact, in only changes our gas mileage from about 16 mpg down to 14 mpg.

Our trailer was MUCH cheaper to buy than a motor home would have been. We bought it used, through the classified ads.

Our trailer doesn't have a motor that needs repairs. (See Linny's Blog to read about their horror story road trip with the used motor home they recently purchased.)

Our trailer keeps us "living simply", rather than getting caught up in the "biggest and the best" as far as RV's go.

Pics of Our Visit with Pastor Barb

Pastor Barb and her Puppies.

The Kids ... Enjoying Barb's Backyard Pool

A Visit with the Jordan's

We had a fun overnight visit with Donna and family last night. You can pop on over to her blog for the fun details and a couple of cute pics of the kids. This bloggy friend and her family have become dear friends (as this was our 3rd overnight visit in 3 months). What a blessing!

We had a BEAUTIFUL drive through the Rogue River area of Oregon this morning, and are now visiting our dear daughter Cassie, who lives in Bend. We're looking forward to a few RELAXING (non-driving) days, before heading home.

Update: I slept 9 hours last night, and 10 hours Sunday night (at the Jordan's). Guess I was tired from all of the driving. I normally sleep about 7 hours a night. I'll probably take a nap today, too. Yes ... I was in need of some relaxation and sleep. Our month on the road has been FUN, but a bit tiring.

How to FOCUS on Your Driving.

The Big Bad Government would have us believe that using cell phones while driving is the root of all evil. They believe that it would be best if we sit in silence while driving, so that we can FOCUS. However, I beg to differ ...

Having personally driven over 6,000 miles in the past 3 weeks, I KNOW that sitting in silence is NOT the best way to FOCUS on my driving. Sitting in silence is the quickest way for my eyes to begin drooping and my focus to begin wavering. When the kids are all sleeping (which happens just about every day while I am driving), I MUST have some music on (to keep my mind focused) and I MUST have the air conditioning on COLD, blowing in my face. If the van is warm and silent ... I quickly find myself un-f0cused and un-safe.

So, what do I do to keep focused and safe? I multi-task. Seriously, multi-tasking keeps my mind active and alert, rather than passive and tired.

Now, when talking on my cell phone while driving, I DO use a Blue Tooth ear piece. It IS safer for me to have both hands on the wheel (especially when pulling a trailer). But, the TALKING does not distract me. So, if I'm not chatting with Carissa, Ben, or Hosanna (and/or the little ones) ... I want to be on the phone, chatting with Papa or any of my Big Kids that aren't with me.

The other thing that I LOVE to do while driving is PLAY GAMES. Seriously, it is a GREAT way to keep my mind alert. What do I play? I play: YAHTZEE. Yes, I do. I love to play YAHTZEE while I drive. Without taking my eyes off the road, I can play a mean game of Yahtzee with my kids. Carissa, Elijah, and I have played 4-5 games of Yahtzee in the past 2 days ... and I have won every game except one.

I reach over to the Rubbermaid Tub in-between the front seats (which makes a great game table). Carissa hands me the cup with the dice. I roll the dice into the tray of the Travel Yahtzee game. Carissa tells me what I've rolled. I tell her what dice to set aside and which ones to put back in the cup. I roll again. Elijah adds up the scores (this is homeschooling math at its best); and Carissa writes down the scores of each turn.

Yesterday, I beat Carissa and Elijah at Yahtzee ... while chatting with Papa on my ear piece ... while driving 65 mph down the freeway in AZ. Seriously, multi-tasking keeps me focused. It really does.

Don't get me wrong ... I KNOW that there have been horrific accidents caused by "cell phone drivers". But, I would guess that most of those are drivers using hand-held phones, rather than ear pieces. I also have to wonder if the cell phone was really the cause. Just maybe those drivers might have gotten into those accidents even if they weren't on the phone. At the same time, how many accidents are caused by eating while driving ... putting makeup on while driving (I've seen this several times) ... or using the computer while driving (saw that one on this trip ... Scary!). However ... have you ever heard of an accident being caused by the driver playing Yahtzee??? Me neither. I guess it's safe.

Are any of you Yahtzee players? How about multi-tasking drivers? What are your tricks for staying focused and alert while driving long distances? I'd love to hear your stories ...

Long Days on the Road

Sorry for the sporadic posts this week. We haven't had wireless internet since last Monday morning. I've borrowed other's computers for a bit here and there; but haven't really had focused computer time for blogging.

We've covered a LOT of miles this week. Wow!

Monday: 415 miles from Houston to Abilene, TX.

Wednesday: 500 miles from Abilene, TX to Las Cruces, NM.

Thursday: 400 miles from Las Cruces, NM to Phoenix, AZ.

Friday: 350 miles from Phoenix, AZ to Sun City, CA

Today: 450 miles from Sun City, CA to Stockton, CA

Tomorrow: 350 miles from Stockton, CA to Medford, OR

Monday: a comparatively short drive from Medford to Bend.

While there were several blogging friends that we would have LOVED to meet in AZ and CA ... we just didn't have time to touch base with everyone. I have a dear daughter in OR that really wants some time with her family ... and a dear hubby at home that is anxiously awaiting our arrival. So, we have pushed hard this week, to head North to the FAMILY that we LOVE and MISS so much.

While these distances may not sound like much to some of you, they are long days for us. I am the only driver. So, 2500 miles in 6 days of driving is a LOT. And, while the speed limit in most of the states is 75 or 80 ... those just aren't safe speeds for our BIG van, pulling a trailer. If I get up over 65, the trailer starts to bounce around a bit. And, in CA, state law requires that vehicles pulling trailers stick to 55 mph, while everyone else is allowed to go 70. Major bummer ... when the state is about 800 miles long. But, I believe that the Lord says clearly in the Scriptures that we are to obey the laws of the land ... and, this includes speed limits, even if we don't think it's necessary or fair. So ... 55 is what I set my cruise control to. Then, of course, we have exceptionally long potty stops if the gas stations we happen to stop at only have one or two potties. Not complaining ... just explaining ... why 500 miles for the 8 of us can take a full 12 hours, which doesn't leave much time for socializing and meeting new friends.

Thanks so much for your prayers.

There has been some improvement in the behavior of one of the young ones (along with a sincere apology for the misbehavior).

We have been kept safe and healthy.

We are laughing and having fun again.

AZ and CA brought us some sunshine.

We found a place to stay near Bend, so we can spend 4 days with sweet Cassie. We will be renting a house in Sunriver, which offered a 2 for 1 special this week. (still not CHEAP; but reasonable).

Please continue to pray for the CRISIS situation. We are in critical need of long-term answers. We have had some serious frustrations and disappointments in this area in the past 2 weeks.

Oh ... another HUGE miracle and answer to prayer ... while the past two summers have brought very limited income from Jim's painting business ... this past month he has become swamped with painting jobs. Yippee! The pastoral position is a long ways off from fully supporting us, so the Lord has BLESSED Jim's painting business, which gives him the flexibility to be a pastor and a painter. PRAISING JESUS for HIS provision!!!

Laughing

Yesterday, I shared that Google Maps was playing games with me ... it couldn't decide whether I had 317 or 397 miles to drive to Phoenix.

In actuality, it was 397 miles, and we got on the road and pushed hard to get here in time for dinner. About an hour out of town, we were thankful that we'd made good time and that we would make it to dinner ... when Ben glanced at the clock on his cell phone.

What? His cell phone said that it was an hour earlier than my watch. We checked and double checked our trusty Atlas ... which said that Phoenix is in the Mountain Time Zone. But, both of our cell phones had re-set themselves to Pacific Standard Time.

I called Jim and asked him to look on the internet to see what time it was. He confirmed that we had entered Pacific Standard Time. So ... our Atlas is WRONG???

We had RUSHED all day ... to get here on time ... and now we were an hour and a half EARLY. Our sweet friend, Pastor Barb, wasn't going to be home until 7:00, and we pulled into her little town at 5:30. We drove around looking for a park for the kids to play, after a long day in the car, but all we could find were private neighborhood parks.

We ended up sitting in a grocery store parking lot for an hour. Ugh! There were several times during the day that we would have loved to stop at historical sites ... or photographic sites ... or taken more time at a lunch stop (rather than eating bagels in the car). But ... we were in a HURRY!

Oh well ... we were able to laugh about it. First the Google Maps were wrong ... and then the Atlas??? What next!? What can we trust to guide us the rest of the way home!?

We're enjoying our time with Pastor Barb (who was our Children's Pastor for 7 years, before moving away a year ago). We're getting caught up on laundry, and the kids are enjoying her backyard swimming pool (and the Arizona SUNSHINE ... woohoo!!!).

By the way ... Pastor Barb tells us that Phoenix doesn't have Daylight Savings Time. So, 1/2 the year they are on Pacific Standard Time and the other 1/2 the year they are on Mountain Time. Oh well!

Tough Day

Here's a re-cap of yesterday ...

we had a long day

we'd like you to pray

500 miles

not many smiles

not much fun

and not much sun

after our long drive

the KOA was a "dive"

no swimming, no laundry, no internet

(all closed up before we arrived)

what are we going to do tonight?

Yes ... yesterday was a TOUGH day. We are dealing with some difficult attitudes in a couple of young ones. Mama's tired. Everyone is tired. And we've still got a LONG drive home.

The weather is beginning to get to us. It's been over a week since we've had a sunny day. Last night we went to sleep to the sound of rain, and woke up in the middle of the night to STRONG winds (which kept me up a couple of hours).

Today was supposed to be a short day, but Google Maps is playing games with me. Yesterday it told me that Phoenix is 317 miles from Las Cruces. Today, it tells me that we have 397 to drive. I did it a 2nd time, and it told me 317 again. But, the 3rd time it told me 397. Ugh. Now, we need to HURRY to get on the road, because we are supposed to be at a friend's house for dinner. So, we have another long day ahead of us ... with no time for dawdling and relaxing.

Sorry for the not-fun post ... but wanted to ask for your prayers.

Please pray ...

1. for good attitudes for 2 young girls

2. for better rest for Mama

3. for joyful attitudes for everyone

4. for more FUN and more SUN

5. for a place for us to stay in

Bend, OR that we can afford

(Cassie wants us to come visit,

but it is too cold to camp. After

spending $650 on trailer repairs,

our budget is a little less than planned.)

6. for continued health and safety

7. for resolution to our summer CRISIS

situation, (see archives for details)

which is causing me MUCH stress right now

Heading West

We are in Abilene, TX for two days. Some dear friends of ours from WA, moved here just this past summer. So, they are excited to have visitors from home.

We're just "hangin' out" today ... as it is POURING rain, with intermittent thunder and lightening. We haven't had a day of sunshine in over a week. Crazy! But ... we're still havin' fun. We did a LOT of schoolwork this morning. Now, I have a few quiet computer minutes, while the kids are starting a Monopoly game with Tammy. (They tried out the swimming pool; but it didn't last long ... with a 69 degree water temp.)

Tomorrow we will start our journey home. New Mexico, Arizona, California, Oregon ... watch out! Here we come! Hopin' for some sun in AZ and CA. We hear it's already been snowin' in OR.

Football ... TEXAS Style

We went to a football game today ...

from 7:30 a.m. until 5:30 p.m.

Yes ... this is TEXAS-Style Football;

and, everything is BIG in TEXAS.

When you go to an NFL game in TEXAS,

you don't just "go to the football game".

No, you need to have a

TAILGATE PARTY ...

before AND after the game.

Who was playing in this football game?

Does it matter?

Not really.

It's all about the PARTY!

Just kidding ...

the TEXANS do like their team.

We watched ...

The Houston Texans

vs.

The Oakland Raiders

What do you do at a TAILGATE PARTY?

You EAT.

Yes ...

you just EAT ...

and EAT some more.

For BREAKFAST, at 9:30, we had:

Breakfast Burritos with Eggs & Chorizo Sausage

Breakfast Burritos with Pork, Cilantro, & Lime

For LUNCH, at 11:30, we had:

Fish Tacos

Shrimp & Mushroom Tacos

For the AFTER-GAME SNACK, at 3:30, we had:

Hamburgers

Sausages

And, of course, between meals we had:

crackers

cookies

brownies

trailmix

grapes

drinks

Now, it's 9:00,

we're home,

and we're having

Roast Beef Sandwiches

for Dinner,

because, obviously,

we didn't get enough

to eat at the game.

Okay ...

more about the game ...

in pictures

After our yummy breakfast,

Uncle D. & Auntie M. asked if they could,

"take the little kids for a walk to see the stadium".

(Since they were not going to go inside for the game.)

"Sure." I responded,

wondering why I hadn't been invited.

Their little walk took quite a little while.

When they returned,

we saw that the kids had been treated to ...

Football Jerseys and Team Hats

Sarah & Rachel ...

eating lunch.

Elijah & Josiah ...

showing off their new outfits.

Elijah ... watching the game.

I tried to take a pic. of my cute kids ...

but Uncle D. told me I had to be in a pic.

The boys ... playing football with their new ball.

(Elijah chose a football rather than a hat.)

Notice all of the "tents" for the TAILGATE PARTIES?

It rained for hours,

with a thunder & lightening storm, too.

The Girls ... watching The Game on t.v.

Oh yes ... we had 30 people for the

TAILGATE PARTY;

but only 19 had tickets to the game.

Auntie M. took Carissa, Ben, & Hosanna into the game;

while Uncle D. stayed outside to party

with me and the little ones.

He bought a satellite dish last week,

so that we could watch the game from the parking lot.

Some of the moms slept ...

... while Uncle D. and the other MEN COOKED!

And, what AMAZING food they prepared!

Auntie M. and the BIG KIDS sure enjoyed the game!

A FUN DAY was had by ALL!!!