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Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Are You Short?



Are any of you under 5' tall?

Do any of you have 
extraordinarily short children?




I am wondering how to help Sarah respond to people when they comment on the fact that she is short (and all 3 of her younger siblings will probably pass her up pretty soon).


Sunday's conversation ...


A woman at church approached the table that Sarah, Rachel, and I were standing by.  She said, "You're the lady with the van, right?"  Which I thought funny ... as if I'm the only lady with a van ... but laughed and nonchalantly said, "No.  We actually sold our van and bought an SUV."  


She then (without even asking my name or introducing herself to me) turned to the cute little African children Sarah and asked, "What is your name?  How old are you?"  Then to Rachel with the same questions.  (Sarah will be 13 next month, while Rachel is 10.)


She looked back and forth between them, finally turning to Sarah to say, "She's almost as tall as you." (as if Sarah wasn't aware of this fact) "Oh well.  Over the next couple of years you will grow a lot more." (as if there were something terribly wrong with her being short, and her sister possibly passing her up in height).


I casually turned to the woman and responded, "Actually, no.  She's done growing.  This is as tall as she'll get."  To which the woman hurriedly rushed off.


I didn't try to embarrass the woman.  But, at the same time I wanted to show Sarah that she could respond honestly, without being embarrassed of her height.


When you look at the 2 girls, Sarah is clearly older.  Her facial features and build are much more mature than Rachel's.  However, the fact is:  Sarah didn't get much nutrition until she was nearly done growing.  The lack of nutrition in her childhood stunted her growth.  Period.  Our doctor told  me last spring that she appears to have reached her adult height, which I think is under 4'8".


Now, the funny thing is that in our family we are certainly not all the same height.  Two of Sarah's big sisters are 5'3" - 5'4" and two of Sarah's big sisters are 5'9" - 5'10".  Thankfully, they aren't all 5'10", to which Sarah would really feel short.  Interestingly, all four of our Big Boys are within an inch of each other at 5'10" - 5"11.


Two of the Big Girls didn't reach my height (5'6"), and none of the Big Boys reached Jim's height (6'2").  It will be interesting to see where the Young Ones end up on the yardstick.  I actually don't expect Rachel to continue growing much longer.  While the girls' birth certificates show them as 10 and 12, they are actually at least 12 and 15.  I expect neither of them will reach 5'.  While in Ghana, I met 3 of their older brothers; and two of the three are extraordinarily short, as well.


Anyway ... let me know if you have dealt with this issue, and what the best response might be for people that make comments implying that it is a horrible thing to be short.  Sarah and I did talk about it after we left church, and I told her that she can just smile and say, 


"Yes.  
I'm short.  
This is how God made me."





8 comments:

  1. great response Laurel...some people certainly don't think about others feelings before they open their mouths...

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  2. Thank you for stopping by my blog, I have been into yours also but always lurked, sorry. I know you have had personal struggles and I'm glad things are turning around for you. Hugs, Trish

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  3. Yep, I've been short all my life. I'm not turning 50 next month and you know what I don't mind being short at all.

    My grandpa use to call me wort.

    The one thing I held onto was "good things come in small packages". Yes they do!

    We rock it being under 5 ft! I am 4' 11". As one doctor told me you know you will shrink a little as you age. I'm ok with that too.

    Things I will never become: basketball player, airline stewardess, able to pick leaves off a high tree branch, reach the top shelf at the supermarket and I'm sure that there are at least a dozen more, but you know what who cares! It is who you are inside and I bet that her personality inside outshines even the tallest of people.

    What I can do: keep up with the best of them in every aspect of my life that I care to.

    We are only limited by what we believe we can't do, she will be able to do anything she sets her mind to I just know it.

    You tell that gal of yours to ROCK ON SISTER! SHORT PEOPLE ROCK!

    :)
    Teri

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  4. My daughter is 6'3" and people are always commenting to her about how tall she is! Her usual response: "really! I hadn't noticed!"

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  5. Teri ... thanks for the thoughts and encouragement. I will share them with Sarah.

    Anita ... love your daughter's response.

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  6. Both of my girls are in the low 5 foot range and are OK with it. Having very tall husbands at this point is a plus for things on the top shelves:)

    But with any differences with our kids, especially our African treasures we consistantly remind them that God is in control--Could He have changed things so they could have had proper nutrition so they would not deal with learning difficulties, Yes He could have, but it was not part of his plan. and his plan is always good.

    I can not begin to tell you how many times Caleb has heard how much his sister has grown and how big she is. Interestingly, they have been the same height for the last 4 years, meaning he has grown just as much as she has--HA

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  7. I am 5 feet tall, or at least I was, but am slightly under that now as I start shrinking! I have heard it all in my life.."good things come in small packages" to "you're too short to ..." I have never let it get in the way of anything. This world would be so boring if we all looked the same, were the same height, had the same talents. I'm so glad that God chose to make us all unique. There were times when I wished to be taller or at least to have adult sized feet so that I could buy high heels for my wedding, but it really hasn't slowed me down.

    Your daughter is beautiful just the way God made her and I hope that someday, she will be able to celebrate in that.

    Sharla
    http://thechaosandtheclutter.com

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  8. I think you handled it well and your response for Sarah is right on. Every single one of us has something we want to change about ourselves. I keep telling mine that God made them and we can work on the things we don't like (our weight, our skin, etc.) but work on the things that matter most (our heart, our attitude). You're doing a great job!

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