The Mother-of-the-Bride Dress

Here is an email that I sent to my eldest daughter, Cassie, last week ...



Hi Cassie,

I've been doing a lot of thinking .....






About the wedding ....






and what I should wear to the weddings this summer ...








While I was so excited to lose a lot of weight before Jeremiah & Ashleigh's wedding, and have been hoping to lose a lot more before your wedding, I've hit a major plateau and it has now become apparent that I won't be able to fit into a skinny-minny dress for your wedding.  Sorry. 









Hope you like it!



mama 

The New Puzzle Piece

If you've missed the last few posts ...
you might want to go back and read them.

We've been talking about God's design ...
for each of our families ...
and how UNIQUELY He created us.

I mentioned that God has shown us one new
piece of the PUZZLE ... as we have been
searching for His New Big Picture for our life.


The New Puzzle Piece:

It's a MAJOR piece of the puzzle ...

but we still don't have a clue 

what we are supposed to be "doing",

on this next part of our Life Journey.

It will be FUN ...

but hard, too.

It's BIG ... 
but it's kind of small, too.

It's EXCITING ...

but scary at the same time.

It's MIRACULOUS ... 
but kind of simple, too.


Some of the family is LAUGHING ...
while others are crying.


What do YOU think it is?






If you already KNOW ... 
please keep your comments to yourself.  


I will be sharing more details ... tomorrow morning.

Living on Purpose

I just read this over at Dardi's Blog and had to share it with you.  It fit so perfectly with what we are "talking" about right now ...

LIVE ON PURPOSE

God chose you to be his people, 

so I urge you now to live the life 

to which God called you.

Ephesians 4:1 NCV

Life is best lived on purpose. And purpose, like everything else in the universe, begins with God. Whether you realize it or not, God has a plan for your life, a divine calling, a direction in which He is leading you. When you welcome God into your heart and establish a genuine relationship with Him, He will begin, in time, to make His purposes known.

Sometimes, God's intentions will be clear to you; other times, God's plan will seem uncertain at best. But even on those difficult days when you are unsure which way to turn, you must never lose sight of these overriding facts: God created you for a reason; He has important work for you to do; and He's waiting patiently for you to do it.  And, the next step is up to you.

Isn't that GREAT?!?!  That is what I was talking about in my last post (that I wrote on Fri. evening at almost the exact same time that Dardi wrote this).  We need to live "on purpose".  We need to live by the design that God created us for.

Right now, our path is unsure ... we don't know which way to turn ... but we KNOW that Our Lord has the map, and He will continue to guide us.  We will continue to seek Him ... to ask Him to show us what work He has for us.  And ... we are EXCITED to see what the Big Picture Puzzle of this New Journey is going to look like.

News of the New Puzzle Piece coming very soon .....

Why Do We Question?

In Bible Study Fellowship this week, we studied Isaiah 45. These verses jumped out at me ...

⁹ “Woe to those who quarrel with their Maker,
those who are nothing but potsherds
among the potsherds on the ground.
Does the clay say to the potter,
‘What are you making?’
Does your work say,
‘The potter has no hands’?
¹⁰ Woe to the one who says to a father,
‘What have you begotten?’
or to a mother,
‘What have you brought to birth?’
¹¹ “This is what the LORD says—
the Holy One of Israel, and its Maker:
Concerning things to come,
do you question me about my children,
or give me orders about the work of my hands?
¹² It is I who made the earth
and created mankind on it.


Who are we to question what the Lord has for us?


Who are we to question what the Lord's plans are for others?


(did you read, "When Family & Friends Reject God's Call On Your Life"?)

God is the Potter ... we are the Clay.


Who are we to even think about trying to tell the Potter what He needs to make out of the Clay?

"Woe to those who quarrel with their Maker ..."


No. I don't want to quarrel with Him.


I so desire that the Lord would make me into whatever HE desires of me.


I am proud to be a rather unique design.



I don't want to look like all of the other "pots" ...


... even if they think I am an odd-shaped pot.


... even if they don't understand my design.


... even if they make fun of the design
    that God created me to be.



I am proud to be Uniquely Me.


I am proud that my family is Uniquely Not-Normal.


I am so glad that we are following God's Unique Journey, the one that He planned Just For Us.


I hope that you, too, are ready to CELEBRATE that God has made you Uniquely You.


I pray that you are willing to allow God to make you into whatever He has designed you to be.



Let's do something fun, and share with each other 1 or 2 things about you or your family that you believe God has designed you for ... something that makes you, Uniquely You.

A New Creation in Christ

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, 
he is a new creation.  


The old has passed away; 
behold the new has come."

2 Corinthians 5:17


Thank you, Jesus ...

...  for making our marriage a New Creation.

...  for taking away the pain of the "old",
     and making our marriage "new" in You.

When Family & Friends Reject God's Call on Your Life

I have been struck recently, by how many of my Real Life Friends and Bloggy Friends are really struggling because of the lack of support from their family and friends.  When they absolutely believe that the Lord has called them ... has specifically ordained them ... for a task; yet, their friends and/or family absolutely believe that they are making the worst decision of their lives.  It is just SO SAD to me.




Has that every happened to you?


How have you responded?




My Sweet Real Life Friend Bridget found out in December that she was expecting Baby #6.  They waited awhile to tell anyone.  They weren't looking forward to the backlash.  They finally put together the GREATEST little video announcement (go HERE to see it ... it's WONDERFUL).   Then, they emailed the announcement to their friends and family and turned off their phones for awhile because they didn't want to deal with the negative comments.  SAD!  Just. So. Sad.  She, of course, knew that Mama D. would be THRILLED!




My Wonderful Bloggy Friend Jessica announced a couple of months ago that she and her husband (along with their 6 children under 7 years old) had decided to move to Africa for full-time missions work.  She wrote THIS post about how heavy her heart was, because of the "comments and rejection and overall disapproval" shown my family members.  She is HURTING, because those closest to her choose not to love her and support her.  Even if they don't understand, couldn't they still CHOOSE to love and support this family???




My Amazing Real Life Friend Amy and her husband decided last year to begin the process of going on the mission field full-time, as well ... with 7 of their 9 children (2 will be college-age, and will stay in the U.S.).  Here is what Amy had to say last month in THIS post:

One thing I am learning is that most people feel comfortable as long as we are just ‘lukewarm’ Christians. Lukewarm, as in, Christians who attend church and claim to know Jesus- and that's about as far as it gets. But the second you do anything radical like adopt a child of a different race or a child with special needs or announce that you are going to give up everything you have ever owned and move to another country to serve the Lord-they are not so comfortable with it anymore.  Why is that?

So far we have literally been disowned by one family member. We have endured the ‘you are crazy’ comment more than I can count. We have been told we have 'given up on Americans’ and asked why we would do this to our children. We have been told that we will regret it- with a few more "you are crazy" added in. We have been asked why we would even want to move to Guatemala and told flat out not to expect financial support from them. We have been told that "all missionaries do is beg people for their money" and mocked for saying the Lord has called us to the mission field.

Do you ever get these types of comments and/or questions?

How do you respond?

I guess I'm just plain tired of how  people treat each other ... expecting everyone to fit into the same little "box".  I am SAD for my friends.  Can you imagine how boring life would be if God created each of us to be exactly alike?!?!  If we all had the same callings, annointings, passions???

We have lived with negative comments for so many years, that sometimes I can stand up and do what God has called me to do, and let the negative reactions just slide off my back.  Other times, however, I too am hurt.  I so want others to understand the life that God has called us to ... even if it doesn't fit in any type of "box" ... even if it is totally "not normal".  And, even if they don't understand it, I just wish they would still be able to love us despite a difference of opinion.

I guess I'm just tired of being judged.

We've been judged harshly, for many years, by family and friends, for having "too many children".

We were judged harshly by family members when we chose to educate our children at home.

We've been judged harshly by the homeschooling community when we've chosen to have our children participate in some of the public school programs.

We've been judged as "too conservative" by other church members, for many years.  (We haven't allowed our children to be involved in every Youth Group activity that the other kids at church have been allowed to be involved in.)

We've been judged as "rebellious" by the ultra-conservative homeschool community.  (We listen to contemporary Christian music, and not just hymns.  We read the N.I.V. Bible, rather than the King James.  We allow Mama and the girls to wear jeans.)

We were judged harshly when we decided to adopt, and add to our already full-house of 10 bio. kids.

We were judged harshly by some in the adoption community, when we chose to parent our adopted children differently than some families choose to.  (We didn't take them to Disneyland.  We didn't take them to T*ys R Us.  We didn't put on HUGE parties for them.)

We were judged harshly when we made the most difficult decision of our life, to disrupt the adoption of one of our children (in order to protect our 5 younger children from a very serious situation).

We were judged when we chose to give up the security of Papa's teaching job, in order to go into full-time ministry.

And, 2 months ago, while comments were few, I'm sure that we were judged when Papa chose to give up his ministry job in order to move home with the family (even though he didn't yet have another job lined up).

Why can't people (especially Believers) realize how painful their judgement and rejection is?

Why can't people accept that God has called each of us to very different lifestyles ... missions ... ministry ... ?

Why am I passionate about this ... right now ... today ???

Not only am I sad for the 3 friends that I mentioned above, but I am preparing myself mentally for more backlash to come ... more negative comments ... more judgement.

The Lord has shown us a new Puzzle Piece for our life journey ... a new path that we will be walking.  The Big Picture is still totally fuzzy ... we are still praying for clear direction ... but He has shown us one of the puzzle pieces (and it's a pretty big piece of the puzzle).

I am sad when I think about the fact that I KNOW we will be judged harshly ... that I KNOW we will be criticized ... that I KNOW we will be misunderstood.

God HAS given us TOTAL peace about this Puzzle Piece ... and I know that my friends also have God's peace in each of their situations.  But ... it still makes me sad ... VERY sad.

I hope that we will all be praying for those that bring judgement on us.

I hope that we never turn from what God calls us to, because of fear of judgement.

I hope that we can BOLDLY walk forward, in FAITH, even when the world questions us ... criticizes us ... or laughs at us.

Thanks for standing with us on this most adventurous journey that the Lord has for the Big D. Family.

UPDATE:  This seems to be a popular topic today.  Courtney just wrote a post today called "Walk in Their Shoes" about the judgment that is passed on families that have to make the heart-wrenching decision to disrupt an adoption.

What If I Hadn't Shared?

Last month, I wrote a post titled, "Is It Right to Share the TOUGH STUFF Publicly?"  I had received several emails from concerned friends.  They didn't think it was good for me to share our marriage crisis with you.  They thought that I should keep quiet about such things.

However ...

Now ...

I must ponder ...

What if I had kept quiet?  


What if I had chosen not to share 
the pain that I was walking through?

Then ...

How would I share the MIRACLE?


How could I possibly help you to see 
how DARK things had gotten?

Only because of the DARKNESS,
can we truly see the LIGHT
that God has now brought into our marriage.

Only because you walked with me through the pain,
can you really understand the JOY in my heart now.

What if I wrote a post now that said ...

"Ummm ... Last month we were walking through a 
tough time, and now God has transformed our marriage."

No.

Not quite the same understanding.

Now that I am ...

SHOUTING FROM THE MOUNTAINTOPS ...

that God has done a MIGHTY MIRACLE ...

you can be encouraged to TRUST God for your own miracle.


Oh no ...

a horrible thought ...

What if I had not asked you to pray for us?


What if I had not "gathered 2 or more together"
on our account?


What if you had not stormed the gates of heaven
for God to bring restoration?

I absolutely know and believe that the prayers sent up by so many of you played a BIG part in the miracle that God chose to do for us.  We will be forever grateful for your love, support, and prayers!


I am PRAISING the Lord that He gave me wisdom about when to share and how much to share.  May HIS name be GLORIFIED in ALL that I do and say.

Our Marriage Miracle

A week ago, on Sunday morning at C.R.C., just after the Lord had revealed to me what, exactly, I had to do in order to complete the Marriage Transformation, (read: What am I willing to do for my marriage?") He also showed me how.


He reminded me of each step of Elijah's Miracle,
(written below in blue)
and related each step to our Marriage Miracle.
(written below in red)


August 16, 2005 ... Elijah almost died.


December 13, 2010 ... Our Marriage almost died.




Elijah was in Critical Condition for 2 weeks,
being cared for by I.C.U. physicians.


Our Marriage was in Critical Condition for 9 weeks,
being cared for by Precious Prayer Warriors.




God chose to heal Elijah.


God chose to heal Our Marriage.




Elijah was sent down to the "main floor"
of the hospital.


Our Marriage was sent to Doug & Joyce,
Calvin & Julie, and C.R.C.




The Infectious Disease Specialists said,
"Elijah will be here in the hospital for
at least another 4 weeks, as he heals."


The "Professional" Christian Authors said,
"You will sit in your Mud Puddle for
at least 6 months, as you grieve."




God said, "I have healed Elijah.  Take him home."
(Just 4 days after the specialists told us it would
 be at least 4 more weeks.)


God said, "I have healed Your Marriage.  Stand Up
and Walk as a New Creation in Christ."




Elijah went home with open wounds. 
(100+ third degree burns had covered his body.)  
He needed much patience and gentleness as 
we did "wound care" for several months.


Our Marriage came home from C.R.C. with wounds.
We will need to give each other patience
and gentleness as we do "wound care" for a time.




Elijah's body is covered with what we call
"Testimony Scars".  We are not embarrassed
by these scars.  No.  They give us reason to
Shout For Joy of the work that God has done.


Our Marriage will always carry some
"Testimony Scars".  Yet, we will not be embarrassed.
No.  We will be thankful that we have reason to
Shout For Joy of the work that God has done.






Yes.


Our God is a God of Miracles!!!


We SHOUT with PRAISE for what HE has done!

A Poem of Love

I just came across this poem, that I copied out of a magazine about 15 years ago, and thought it might bring some encouragement to many of you.


A Poem of Love:
for the homeschooling mom


by Pam Radjeski
(edited by Mama D.)




If I have the ability to master the German, Latin, and English Languages, as a matter of fact, if I could master every language, but don't really love my children, I am only a bellowing woman creating an irritating noise.


If I have a gifted intellect and can fathom the depths of psychology and understand the mysteries of chemistry, and if I have such a powerful faith that I can cause school board officials and legislators to accept and admire home education, but don't express tender love to my children, I am useless.


If I give all my time encouraging other mothers, and I am willing to go to jail for my convictions, but I haven't shown my children unconditional love, I am wasting my time.


Love is patient with slow readers.  Love is kind when efforts end in failure.  It does not envy a brighter neighbor child; it does not boast of superior methods; it is not proud of self-sacrifice.  It is not rude to public school teachers; it does not seek recognition; it is not easily angered when non-home-schooling friends ignore our efforts; it holds no grudges against unfriendly newspaper reporters.  Love does not delight when the public school system produces illiterate students, but rejoices when godliness is victorious.


Love never fails.  But where there are formulas to calculate future events, they will come to an end.  Languages, and the study of them, will disappear.  Where there is knowledge ... science projects, history reports, math lessons ... they will all pass away.


Just as we were once children, our children are young and immature.  They speak like children, think like children, act like children.  Some day they will mature into adulthood, and all this will be behind us.


Yet, what is the greatest thing we can do for our children?


Love them.  Hug them.  Hold them.  Discipline them.  Teach them.  The greatest of these is love.

A Question About the Holy Spirit

In my recent post, "Do You Listen?", I asked the question,

"Do you listen when the Holy Spirit speaks to your heart?"

Susan, a sweet young reader from Australia, left the following comment:

Your post about listening to the Holy Spirit and writing down what He is sharing or speaking, reminds me of Mary Ruth Swope's book, "Listening Prayer"... I have tried to do this, but am met with silence, I recall Mary saying that receiving the baptism of the Holy Spirit is essential. I guess I need to be baptised with the Spirit first in order to be able to listen to Him in a way that I can write down what He is speaking?

Readers ... I would LOVE to get your thoughts on this topic ...

Obviously, I am well aware that this can be a very controversial subject ... so, please, let's remember to be respectful. (smile)

Heaven is for Real

Oh my!

Have any of you heard about this book?

It is ...

TRULY AMAZING!

INCREDIBLE!

UNBELIEVABLE!

INSPIRING!


"Heaven is for Real" by Todd Burpo is the story of his son, Colton.  When Colton was just 3 years old, he nearly died from a ruptured appendix.  While having emergency surgery, Colton took a trip to heaven ... he stood in the presence of Our Lord.

When our son Elijah was 3 years old, he too nearly died ... from Bacterial Meningitis.  While lying in a coma for a week, Elijah took two trips to heaven ... he stood in the presence of Our Lord ... twice.

Reading Colton's story was extra powerful for me, because it was so similar to Elijah's story.  Remarkably similar, really.  When they first learned of Colton's journey with Jesus, his mom asked THE EXACT SAME QUESTION that I asked when we learned that Elijah had spent time with Our Lord.

We will be reading this book for Family Story Time.  I can hardly wait to tell the kids all about Colton's journey to heaven and back.

Do You Listen?

Did you read my last post?

(If not, please read it first.)


While we can stand in AWE for what the Lord has done for ...

...  someone else's life

... someone else's relationships

... someone else's marriage


Do you read my testimonies and apply them to your own life, or just think, "Wow, God!  That's cool what you did for Papa & Mama D."

I hope you will consider the following questions ...

Do you listen to the Holy Spirit when He speaks to your heart?

Do you hear Him clearly?

Have you ever written down what He is saying to you?

Do you act upon what He tells you to do?  No matter how hard?

I encourage you to, "Listen Up!".  

I believe the Lord has a very clear message for each of us, 

if we will take the time to ... 

...  listen 

... believe 

... and act upon His message.

What Am I Willing To Do For My Marriage?

Last Sunday morning, the Lord had a talk with me.  He asked me some very direct and specific questions that I needed to answer in order for His Marriage Transformation to be complete.  


He spoke quickly and clearly to my heart ... as I scribbled rapidly in my notebook, not wanting to miss one word of His message for me.  Here is what the Lord spoke to me ...



Are you willing to Give Up Your Rights ...


...  your right to leave your marriage?


...  your right to be angry?


...  your right to sit in your Mud Puddle?






Are you willing to Stand Up and BELIEVE
that I, the Lord, have done a miraculous healing?






Are you willing to "Stand Up and Walk", in FAITH,
that I, the Lord, have healed your marriage?


"Then he said to the paralytic, "Get up, take your mat and go home."  And the man got up and went home.  When the crowd saw this, they were filled with awe; and they praised God."  Matthew 9:6-8




Are you willing to ...




...  TRUST again?




...  BELIEVE that I, the Lord, have given Jim
     a new and fresh LOVE for you?




...  BELIEVE that your marriage has been Re-Created,
     that your marriage is a New Creation in Christ?






You MUST walk in FAITH and BELIEVE in your heart,
that I, the Lord Jesus Christ, have 
given your marriage a NEW LIFE.




This is the ONLY way to walk in TRUE FORGIVENESS.






These are the words spoken directly to my heart,
from my Comforter and Counselor, the Holy Spirit, 
on Sunday, February 13, 2011.  




I will treasure them always.




As soon as I responded, "Yes, Lord." I knew in my heart
that God had truly transformed our marriage.  He
had worked the most unbelievable miracle
in each of our lives and in our marriage.  


We stand in AWE!


We PRAISE HIS HOLY NAME!

"I Will Turn Darkness Into Light." Isaiah 42:16

"Sing to the Lord a new song, 
his praise from the end of the earth.  ...  


Let the habitants of Sela sing for joy, 
let them shout from the top of the mountains.  


Let them give glory to the Lord, 
and declare his praise in the coastlands.  ...   


And I will lead the blind 
in a way that they do not know, 
in paths that they have not known 
I will guide them.  


I will turn the darkness before them into light, 
the rough places into level ground.  


These are the things I do, 
and I do not forsake them."



Isaiah 42:10-12, 16






Thank You, Jesus ...


...  for leading us when we were blind.


...  for guiding us on the paths we did not know.


...  for turning our darkness into light.


...  for turning the rough places into level ground.