Keeping It Real

As I've mentioned many times ... I like to be "Real" ... and I like it when others are "Real" about their lives, too.  I am just not in to writing or reading "Fairy Tale" blogs.


A couple of bloggy friends were "Real" this week, and I could so relate.




Anita's older kids had been gone for a couple of days.  Here is how she described life when they came home,


"This afternoon the big kids came home and the decibel level skyrocketed! [It didn't help that Taevy told her grandparents she needed to take her ADHD medication only once a day rather than 3 times a day!] The stress level went up. The arguments increased. These all sound like bad things, but I sure do like it better when all of my kids are together. As dysfunctional as we are, we were placed together to make this family. It doesn't feel right any other way."


Thanks, Anita, for being REAL with us!  LOVE it!


Have any of you ever been told that your family is "dysfunctional"?  


Are you judged because you're "not normal"?


You know what ... we aren't normal either.  We each have our issues.  None of us are perfect.  Dad's not perfect.  Mom's not perfect.  None of our kids are perfect.  But ... we are FAMILY, imperfect that we are, and that is what matters most.




Dorothy had this to say this week ...


"Parenting kids with FASD's often puts moms and dads onto an emotional roller coaster with no end in site and some sort of crazy unseen program running the controls.  Life can be exhausting, overwhelming, terrifying and just plain hard  - it can be intense enough to break the strongest parenting plan and melt the most type A person into a sobbing emotional puddle in the corner.  We can also drift through smooth seasons which renew us and moments of intense clarity where we find an overwhelming gratitude for the goodness of God in designing our families exactly the way they are."


Yes.  


Oh. So. Right. There. With. You. Dorothy.


FASD or RAD or any number of abbreviations that go beside our traumatized children's names make life HARD.  It can be truly exhausting, overwhelming, and terrifying.  It can melt us into a "sobbing emotional puddle in the corner".  But ... it IS God who "designed our families exactly the way they are".  


Yes.




My sweet friend, Sarah also emailed this week with a simple, 


"What a messy life we have sometimes, Laurel."


Oh. So. True.




But ... it was God who brought all of us imperfect and dysfunctional people together and said, "It is good."  He created each of our families ... in all their messiness.  He knew we would not be perfect.  He knew we would make mistakes.  But ... we are NOT a mistake.  God didn't say, "Oops!" when He brought each member of our family together.  He created us ... He designed us .... as individuals and as a family.




We may look like a mismatched group of "dysfunctional" people ... but our families were created by God's design.


Our traumatized children can bring unimaginable pain into our families ... but that doesn't mean that we are bad parents.


Life can get "messy" ... but that doesn't mean that we've done something wrong.




I hope this will encourage you to "Just Be Real".


I hope this will show you that you aren't the only family who's life is "messy" sometimes (or all the time).


I hope this will encourage you to celebrate your family's differences ... to rejoice in being "not normal".


I hope we can each thank God for designing our families ... no matter how "not normal" ... how dysfunctional ... how messy our lives can get.  He is the Creator ... the Designer ... and He will give us all that we need to do what He has called us to do within each of our messy lives.

A Weekend at Mt. Baker

Thanksgiving was very different 

for our family this year ... 

but very FUN.

After 20 years of going to a Christian Family Camp in Oregon for Thanksgiving, we had to make other plans this year because I got a job at the Family Christian Store for the holidays.


Since I knew it would be hard on all of us if we "just stayed home", Papa and I decided that we would take the kids up to Mt. Baker for the long weekend.  It was close enough to home that I could drive in to work on Friday, but far enough away that it was definitely still "a weekend away".


And ... seriously a bonus ... we had no internet or cell phone reception.  We were less than an hour from home, but the little town we stayed in is kind of tucked into the side of the mountain and doesn't get any reception.  (You can get cell reception just 15 minutes down the mountain ... or 15 minutes up the mountain.  But, the little town of Glacier loses all cell service.  Which ... we thought was GREAT.)

So ... what did we do without internet or cell phone service?  

We ate good food.  

We played games.  

We read books.  

We ate more food.  

We played more games.  


We watched a few movies.


We ate more good food.

We enjoyed each other's company.

Here are a few pics from our time at The Mountain ...

We ate good food.

(Thanksgiving Brunch Casserole)

We took naps.

(Gregg came up from Seattle for the day.)

We went up to the ski area on Thursday and

FROZE Our Faces.

(The wind was whipping and the snow was blowing.)

We couldn't go sledding in the storm,

but we played in the snow.

(Bad picture due to CRAZY blowing snow.)

We hid in the trees to get away from the wind.

(Let' play, "Finding Hosanna".)

We went back up to the ski area on Saturday,

and went sledding in the RAIN.  

Seriously.

It was 36 degrees and RAINING,

but we still had FUN.

We warmed up in the Hot Tub at the cabin.

We cooled down in the rain.

Yes.

We sat in the hot tub in the rain.

That's what you do when you live in Western Washington:

you don't wait around for it to quit raining,

or you would miss out on a lot of living.

Despite the disappointment of missing our 20 year tradition,

we had a whole lot of FUN at The Mountain.

It was kind of nice to only be an hour away.

We didn't miss the CRAZY traffic that we always 

get going to and from Oregon for Thanksgiving.

It was nice to not have any schedule for 5 days

(except when I had to drive in to work on Friday).

While we LOVE going to Family Camp,

it is a very structured and scheduled weekend.

While we certainly missed being with all of the other Big Kids,

it was very nice to spend the holiday with Gregg.  

He couldn't stay for the weekend, though, as 

he had to work at 6:00am on Black Friday.

It was GOOD.

It was FUN.

We were BLESSED.

Job Possibility Update

The job Papa applied for the other day, at the refinery, turned out to be a "we are gathering a list of applicants for potential work in the next couple of months" situation.  


No current job openings.


So sad.


However ... we just found out about another possible painting job for a contractor.  Something else to pursue ...


Please keep Papa's unemployment situation in your prayers.


We continue to TRUST the LORD for His will and guidance.

Christmas Is Coming!

Have any of you done your Christmas Shopping yet?  


If so, how much is done: 25% complete ... 50% ... 75%?


Just curious.


I went Christmas Shopping last week and did about 80% of my shopping.  Woo Hoo!!!  It was FUN to buy a couple of things for each of the at-home kids (and Papa).  We don't make a big focus on presents ... and we have definitely had years where we didn't have money for any presents ... but this year it was nice to be able to go out and buy a few things.


I shopped at Kohls for our Christmas Eve Pajamas, and a new Christmas Table Cloth to go along with my new decorating.  They had a good sale going on for each of the things on my list.


I am so excited for my Christmas Decorating this year.  Oh. My. Yes.  Last year, we pulled out a few decorations, but never even purchased a Christmas tree, as we were traveling to and from Houston for Jeremiah's wedding, and were gone from December 10 - 23rd.  This year, not only will we be HOME for the month of December, but I am excited to figure out how to decorate with all of my new furniture. (The dining room hutch and living room bookshelves give me more flat surfaces to decorate.  Yippee!)


I would LOVE to hear what some of YOUR favorite Christmas traditions are.  Decorating?  Gifts?  Yummy Treats?

I Am Thankful ...

... For My Husband.

Jim is ...

...  my One True Love.

...  my Provider.

...  my Protector.

...  my Defender.

...  my Helper.

...  my Best Friend.

He's also an amazing helper around the house (especially when unemployed and looking for things to do).

A couple of days ago, I sat down to make a menu plan and shopping list for the weekend.  Jim walked into the room and plopped 2 printed sheets on the table.  He had not only made a menu plan for 5 days / 3 meals per day ...  he had made the shopping list.  What a guy!

Since we cannot travel to Oregon this year, due to my working Black Friday at the bookstore, we are, instead, going to spend the weekend in a cabin at Mt. Baker.  (Close enough that I can drive in to work on Friday.)  Jim even organized and packed all of the food for the weekend.

Yes.

He is a BLESSING!

Hope you all have a BLESSED weekend!

Happy Thanksgiving ...

Hope Your Day Is BLESSED!

Please Pray For My Friend Sarah ...

My dear friend Sarah and her family (a mother of 16) are walking a very difficult journey due to R.A.D. (Reactive Attachment Disorder).  Please pray for them this week.  As most of us are having a fun and relaxing week celebrating Thanksgiving, Sarah's family is in the midst of making one of life's most difficult decisions:  what to do with a child who cannot come home.  


Sarah wrote this post this week:  A Letter to RAD .  I hope you will read it (to gain some understanding into the life that far too many adoptive parents lead).

A Sad Day At The Grocery Store

Just last week, I spent a few hours at my favorite hair salon.  Not only is my Stylist a good friend, but she is a Miracle Worker:  she keeps me young looking.  


By cutting off a couple of inches, my natural curls perked up a bit.  And a foil highlight brightened things up, and covered the wee bit of gray that is beginning to crop up.  (Oh my!  Time to admit that I might be beginning to age.)


Anyway ... I headed out to the grocery store with Hosanna today.  I was wearing my new "modern & cute" boots, with my jeans tucked in.  I had just done my hair (and actually thought, "So glad I still look young." when I looked in the mirror).  I was wearing a cute purple hooded sweatshirt (again, thinking I have kept myself young and contemporary looking).


And ... horror of all horrors ... while checking out ... 

the clerk asked if I was eligible 

for the senior discount.  

What?!?!  I had to ask her to repeat herself, because I was in shock.  (She probably thought I had lost my hearing in my old age.)



I was NOT with any of my 6 twenty-something children (which could make me feel a bit "older").  No.  I was with my young and beautiful 15 year old daughter (which could easily put me in my 40's (which I am ... for another 2 months).


The "senior discount" gives 10% off on Tuesdays to those over 55.  


Really?!?!  


I look 55+?!?!


So sad.


Maybe the clerk is aging and needs glasses ???

Just A Little Oops ...

I almost forgot to tell you about a funny little "decorating" story that took place last month.

When we bought the new bookshelves (from craigslist) for the living room, we were so excited that they were exactly what we were looking for.  The measurements were unbelievable.  They were exactly the same height of our mantel, and exactly the same depth of our hearth.

However, once we got home with the bookshelves, we realized that our mantel extended a couple of inches out beyond the brick ... which left a rather awkward looking gap between the bricks and the bookshelves.

We would love to get a custom mantel made, to tie the bookshelves together for a "built-in" look ... but that wasn't happening today or tomorrow.  So, I asked Jim if he couldn't just "cut off the extra couple of inches" from the mantel.  It wouldn't matter if they were "rough" looking, as the bookshelves would cover the rough cut.

Off to the hardware store Jim headed, to buy a special little saw for the project.

After awhile, I was working in the School Room when Jim appeared at the door.  He seemed to hesitate a bit as he said, "I need you to come see something in the living room."

As I walked around the corner, I saw the mantel hanging awkwardly ... completely ripped from the wall (w/ corresponding rip marks in the drywall).  Oh dear!

Jim explained that the mantel had only been anchored to the wall in 2 places ... the 2 ends that he had cut off.  So, when he cut them ... the ends stayed put and the mantel ripped away from the drywall.

I laughed (fully assured that Jim could fix this little mess) and asked if he couldn't possibly re-anchor it in 2 new places (and fix the drywall "oops").

So, here's the newly cut and re-anchored mantel, with the drywall all fixed and the living room freshly painted (in new colors).  (The antique window frame will become a picture frame once I make time to cut the mats.)

Full Living Room pics coming soon.

We are LOVING the new ... 

bookshelves ...

paint colors ... 

curtains ...

piano ... 

baskets ... 

lamps ... 

end table ...

and

fall decor.

Praying For A New Job Possibility ... While Thanking God For His Continued Provision

Papa hasn't worked since September.  While we PRAISE God for money in the bank that has carried us through, it would be REALLY nice if he could get a job.


Papa just found out that the refinery company he worked for last spring (a temporary 6 week job) is hiring again.  He headed right down to the company headquarters this morning to turn in his application.


Please pray ...


...  that the Lord would give him favor 
     with the personnel office.


...  that he would get a full-time position.


...  that he would get hired for the refinery 
     that is 30 minutes from home, rather 
     than the one 1 1/2 hours from home.
     (He will commute if he has to, though.)


...  for wisdom for Papa as he continues to seek
     a full-time career position, and not "just a job".


     * should he go back into Teaching?
        (He applied for 14 positions last summer?)


     * should he go back into the Ministry?


     * will the Lord build his Painting Business?


     * will the Refinery become a career?


     * should we look for jobs out of the area,
        and be willing to move anywhere?
       (There is a ministry job down near Seattle,
        but we are so NOT "city people".)






Again ... 


We are THANKING and PRAISING God for His continued provision (although Papa so desires to be working again).


We are THANKING God for the time Papa has had at home the past 2 months, which has given us the time and energy to complete our Re-Decorating Project.


We are THANKING God for the time Papa has had at home the past 2 months, which has given us time for continued Marriage Restoration (after a very TOUGH year).


We are THANKING God for provision through extra Painting Jobs in August & September.


We are THANKING God for provision through the Adoption Tax Credit (even though we still have not yet seen the full amount that we are owed).


We are THANKING God for provision through the buying and selling of things on Craiglist.  (It truly has been amazing; and our balance sheet is still on the positive.)


Yes.  


We are THANKFUL this week, and are so looking forward to a quiet, Family Thanksgiving.




Please keep Papa's Job Situation in your prayers.




What are YOU Thankful for today?

Sold !

Woo Hoo!


Jim told me on Friday, "We need these couches gone THIS WEEKEND."


I put an ad on craigslist on Friday night.  


I mentioned them in yesterday's blog post.  


I got an email today from a local Bloggy Friend.  


She stopped by after church.  


Her boys said, "Buy them.  Buy them."


We were able to bless them with a good price.  


They were able to bless us by taking them this afternoon, so that we can FINISH our Decorating Project.


Thank You, Jesus!

Are You Ready For Thanksgiving?

Both Thanksgiving and Christmas are going to be VERY different around here this year, but I am looking forward to them.




Thanksgiving

Are you ready for Thanksgiving?

Will you be traveling or staying home?

Just your family, or a house full of "extras"?

For the past 20 years, we have traveled to our favorite Christian Family Camp in Oregon for Thanksgiving.

For the past 20 years, Jim has been a teacher or pastor, which meant that he could take 4 or 5 days off for this most special family holiday.

For the past 20 years, our lives have been completely unaffected by "Black Friday", as we have never been anywhere near a shopping center on the day after Thanksgiving.

This year ... however ... we have seen many months of unemployment.

This year ... however ... we knew that we needed to work if there was work to be had.

This year ... however ... Mama will be working at the Christian bookstore for the holiday season.

Which means that ...

...  Mama will be working on Black Friday.

...  the family won't be traveling 
      to Oregon for Thanksgiving.

...  Papa & Mama will be fixing Thanksgiving Dinner 
     for the first time in 20 years.




This year ... 3 of our Big Kids got married, and have made plans with their spouses.


This year ... Lindsey is doing another YWAM School in Colorado.


This year ... Carissa has chosen to spend the holiday with some of her siblings.


Therefore ...


This year ... Gregg will be the only Big Kid spending Thanksgiving with the family.  (He, too, has to work on Black Friday ... so we will only get the 1 day with him.)


Yes ... Thanksgiving will be very different this year.


But ... we are looking forward to a quiet weekend of game playing, movie watching, and eating yummy food with the 6 Younger Kids.


And ... we are hoping for some SNOW to play in.   (With our new-to-us 4x4 Excursion, we can head to the mountains to PLAY this winter ... something that we have never been able to do in the past 20 years of driving a 15 passenger van.  Woo Hoo!!!)

Almost Done!

We are working hard this weekend to finish up our Re-Decorating Project (see THIS post and THIS post).  Papa is painting the last 2 walls of the Family Room this morning.  Then, he will install the new curtain rods and will put up new curtains.


We had held off for a few days on these last 2 walls, because I had been looking on Craigslist for 3 months for new couches for the Family Room, and I REALLY wanted to paint the 2 small walls an accent color to match the couches ... but had almost given up on finding something that was the style & color I was looking for ... and the right price (as in ... very cheap).


God came through this week and BLESSED this last little step of our project.  We are Praising Him for being a God of the Little Details.


Several years ago, we were totally blessed with an inexpensive hand-me-down set of 3 couches.  They were in great shape.  They were quality furniture.  They have served us well.  But ... they were oh. so. not. my. style.

It's not that I didn't like them (or appreciate them).  I would have been just fine with them in a formal living room.  However, they just didn't "fit" the relaxed, comfortable style of a Kid/Teen Hang-Out Room that we were wanting.

So, I've been looking on Craigslist for 3 months for "just the right furniture" ...

...  something comfortable.

...  something casual.

...  something with a "country" look.

...  at least 2 couches or a sectional,

     preferably with a matching chair or two.

...  something to go with the deep blue carpet.

...  hopefully something to coordinate with the

      yellow attached 2nd kitchen and hallway

     (so that Papa wouldn't need to paint those, too).

And ... God knew ALL of those details, and came through for us with just the "perfect" set of furniture ... at just the right price ... at just the right time.

A Blue Denim Sectional

complete with Red & White Pillows.

(The accent walls will be red, which

will look great next to the yellow

kitchen and hallway walls.  The other

walls are newly painted taupe, and I had 

already purchased navy blue curtains.)

A Grandma's Rocking Chair

w/ matching footstool.

(So that I can rock Noah while

watching Family Movies.)

 God even gave us a BONUS gift.

A Big Ottoman

w/ storage space for blankets.

(Mama LOVES an Ottoman and Fluffy Blankets 

while watching movies with Papa & the Gang.)

But ... that's not ALL that the Lord gave us this week.  Oh. My. No.  

For the past 3 months I had also been scouring Craigslist for an Oak Corner T.V. Cabinet.  We have had a nice T.V. Cabinet in the Living Room ... a Rustic Pine Style that matched our Rustic Pine Game Cupboard.  However, we purchased another Rustic Pine Cabinet for the Family Room this fall ... moved the Rustic Pine Game Cupboard downstairs ... and were hoping to move the Rustic Pine T.V. Cabinet downstairs for our stereo.  Thus, the hunt for an Oak t.v. cabinet to match all of the oak furniture in the Living/Dining Rooms.

Again ... totally NOT a priority, but one of those, "It would be nice if _______." type of things.  So, I perused the ads.  And, this week, the same day that I found the denim sectional, there is was ... a small oak t.v. cabinet that will fit perfectly in our small corner for our small living room t.v.  

Funny thing is ... we don't even watch t.v.  We've never had cable.  We know nothing about having 50+ channels.  We haven't watched network t.v. in 20 years.  But, we do occasionally like to watch movies (and Papa & Mama might occasionally watch a t.v. show on our computers).  And, with so many people of so many ages, we do want movie watching capabilities in both the Family Room and Living Room (thus the need for t.v. cabinets when we don't even watch t.v.).

So fun.  So exciting.  So THANKFUL for the LORD's gifts of the little details.

Much to do today ...

...  finish organizing the newly painted School Room.

...  organize Mama's new Scrapbook Area.  Yippee!

...  finish organizing the Living/Dining Rooms.

      (just a couple of boxes of things left to go through)

...  take pictures of all of our "new" rooms to share with

     all of you sweet Bloggy Friends.

Let me know if you are looking for a great price on 3 matching couches (1 couch and 2 love seats).  I need to sell them a.s.a.p., as the Family Room is a bit crowded right now.