It Is Time ...

...  For Jim To Get A Job

Yes.  It.  Is.

Some of you are going to laugh at me.

Some of you are going to want to scold me for complaining.

Some of you are going to be a bit envious.

Why is it TIME for Jim to get a job?

Because he is TOO GOOD around the house.

He is TOO COMPETENT.

He is TOO "in control" of each and every area.

He homeschools the children.

He cooks most of the meals.

He organizes the kids' chores.

He does the grocery shopping.

He does the laundry.

He even makes the homemade laundry soap.

Why is this a PROBLEM?

Because ... 

Mama is LOST.

I don't know my ROLE.

I don't feel NEEDED at home.

I've lost my place in my home.

THAT is why Mama has been focused on finding a job.

But ... 

now that the LORD has told Mama

that she needs to stay HOME,

then she needs to re-find her role,

she needs to know where she fits,

she needs to be needed.

Seriously, friends, this is not a laughing matter.  

It has been nearly 3 years since we have lived a "normal" family life ... since Papa went to work every day while Mama stayed home with the kids (cooking, cleaning, homeschooling).  

Okay.  I know.  

We haven't been "normal" in 25 years ... 

but you know what I mean.

3 years of "not-normal"

3 years of transitions

3 years of financial struggle

3 years = FAR too long

June 2009  *  Papa walked away from his classroom

August 2009  *  Papa moved to the island to pastor

Sept./Oct. 2009  *  Mama & Kids took a 5 week road trip

November  2009  *  Mama & Kids moved to the island

April 2010  * Mama & Kids moved home without Papa

Aug/Sept 2010  *  Mama & Kids took a 6 week road trip

December 2010  *  Marriage Crisis

December 2010  *  Papa quit his job and moved home

Now ... just so you know ... I am NOT complaining about Papa being home a lot this year (after him living on the island for 16 months).  It has been GOOD.  It has been IMPORTANT.  But ... I do believe it is TIME for us to try to figure out "normal" again.

We were totally BLESSED that Papa was unemployed for 3 months last winter (even though the financial stress was not fun).  It was IMPERATIVE that we had TIME to work through our Marriage Crisis (see archives).  God not only gave us 3 months to FOCUS on our marriage, but He had Adopted Big Kid Vicky come live with us, to homeschool the children.

Then ... we were BLESSED by Papa's temporary job at the refinery (April-May) ... BLESSED again by Papa's temporary job with a painting contractor (July-September) ... BLESSED again by the independent painting jobs that Papa had (August-September) ... BLESSED again by the Adoption Tax Credit (which saw us through a winter of unemployment).

Then ... we were once again BLESSED by more months of unemployment.  We had a WONDERFUL 2 months (October-November) of Re-Organizing and Re-Decorating (see "Decorating" in the archives).  We were focused.  We had a project to work on together (which was very good for the marriage).  We had FUN together.  Our house can be ready to sell quickly, if the Lord leads us to a job somewhere else.

Then ... came the last 3 months (December-February) ...  


Not in any way meaning to diminish my role ... not in any way trying to be "controlling" or "domineering" ... Papa simply started doing EVERYTHING.  His intent was to be a "helper" to me ... which I ... Oh.So.Appreciate.  

I know that many men really struggle with depression during extended times of unemployment.  I know that many unemployed men spend hours on the couch watching t.v., not necessarily helping their wives.  I know that many unemployed men can get grouchy and uncommunicative.  So ... what am I complaining about?!?!

I really am THANKFUL for ALL that Jim has done.  I APPRECIATE it immensely.  He has always been a VERY involved Daddy; and he knows how hard things were for me when he lived on the island for 16 months (and I did the "single mom thing" at home, without his support).

But ...

It. Is. Time.

Papa needs to go to work.

Mama needs to be able to "run the show" at home.

Mama wants to have a schedule again.

Mama wants to homeschool the kids again.

Mama wants to use her treadmill again.

Mama wants to be able to plan fun activities with the kids.

Mama wants to plan field trips.

And, when the kids come to Mama with a question,

Mama wants to be able to answer the question,

and not always say, "You need to ask Dad."

Praying that the LORD will bring a 
full-time permanent position to Jim very soon.

We are ready for some stability.

We are ready to find our "new normal".

Mama is so ready to "Be The Mom" again.

Thank you, Jesus, for such a confident, capable,
willing, and helpful husband and daddy ... 
but please bring him a 
full-time non-temporary job soon.


I want my Mommy job back.






Update:  After writing this, Jim found out that he will 
start work at the refinery next Monday morning.  
While it is not a long-term career position, we are 
REJOICING that Jim will be working for the next 8-10 weeks 
(and I get to be the full-time Mommy again).  Thank you, Jesus!