Speak Up!

It's time for ME to Speak Up . . . and encourage YOU to Speak Up.


Have you ever noticed that you "thought" a friend had lost weight,
but you didn't Speak Up because . . .

. . .  you weren't sure.

. . .  you didn't want to embarrass the "Weight Loser",
       who might very well still need to lose more weight.

. . .  you didn't know what to say.

. . .  you just plain felt a little awkward about saying anything,
       either because you, also, have a lot of weight to lose  . . .
       or because you don't have any weight to lose
      and don't want to put your overweight friend on the spot.



As an overweight woman who has just lost 40 pounds in 4 1/2 months,
I want to encourage you to Speak Up if you notice any weight loss in your friends.



I do not talk about my Weight Loss Journey with anyone locally except 
My Dear Friend Sarah who is walking the journey with me, 
and has lost 50 pounds in 5 1/2 months.

Most of my local friends do not read my blog.

Therefore, there are very few people in my day to day life 
that are even aware of my Takin' Care of Mama Journey.

When I had lost 25 pounds in 2 1/2 months,
I was surprised that no one had mentioned noticing a difference,
especially when I began wearing a smaller size pair of jeans.

Then I read an online Weight Loss chat where several people who were quite overweight
(none of us really like the title of "morbidly obese") said that no one had mentioned
noticing their weight loss until they reached 30 or 35 pounds lost.

So, I patiently waited.

When I had lost 30 pounds in 3 months,
I began to wonder when someone might say something.

I went to a party where I saw multiple friends I hadn't seen in a few years.
I wore my smaller size pair of jeans . . . and a smaller size sweater.
I was SURE someone would notice . . . someone would say something.
I walked in and a friend ran to greet me,
"LAUREL . . . I LOVE . . . your haircut!"
Seriously?
I almost laughed.
"Oh.  Thanks.  Yes.  I just got it cut."

By the time I reached 35 pounds lost in 3 1/5 months,
I was very surprised that I hadn't heard from even. one. person.
(aside from the friends who do read my blog and are aware of my weight loss 
journey . .  and do tell me that they can TOTALLY tell that I've lost weight)

Finally . . . at 35 pounds lost . . . one friend asked, "Have you lost weight?"

"Yes!" I thought,  "Others will now start to notice."


Now . . .

. . .  I have lost 40 pounds.

. . .  I wear new jeans that are 2 sizes smaller.

. . .  I bought a new shirt and sweater smaller
       than any I've worn in many years.

. . .  I am smaller than any of my local friends have EVER seen me,
       smaller than I was when we moved here 12 years ago.


I went to an all day Women's Ministry event yesterday,
wearing all of my new "skinny-to-me" clothes,
and REALLY thought that one of my church friends would notice.


But . . .

nope . . .

not a word is heard.

None of the ladies from church (that I see weekly) 
have. said. one. word.

None of my long time friends (who I run into every few months) 
have. said. one. word.

None of my "old" friends (who I recently ran into after not seeing for 4 years) 
have. said. one. word.


I'm not angry.

In fact it has now gotten quite comical . . . just wondering
exactly how skinny I have to be before anyone notices.
(Will they notice at 75 pounds lost, or not until 100?)


Jim says, 
"You look skinnier almost every day.  I can't believe how different you look."


Hosanna says, 
"Maybe your friends don't know what to say."


So.

I am here to encourage you . . . to Speak Up.



What do I say?

"Hi.  Have you lost weight?  You look great!"

Even if they have not lost weight recently,
they will appreciate the compliment.

And if they have recently lost weight,
they will be very excited that you have noticed.


In September (after I had lost nearly 25 pounds),
I ran into an old friend who I noticed had lost weight.

I immediately said (quietly so as not to attract attention),
"Have you lost weight?  You look great!"

"Yes."

"How much?"

"40 pounds"

"Wow!  That's awesome."


Now . . . not at all that I was fishing for compliments . . . because she DID look great . . . 
but I was surprised that she, too, said. not. a. word. about my weight loss.  Weird!


Funny side of this whole issue . . .

for the friends that do know I am on a weight loss journey . . .

and the one friend who did notice the weight loss . . .

every. single. one. of. them. have said,

"I can see it in your face."

So . . .

I am left to wonder . . .

did I have a REALLY fat face???  (smile)

I just envision losing 40 pounds from Chipmunk Cheeks, or something.


Clearly, that is more polite than saying,

"I noticed your big behind has shrunk."

or

"What happened to your Thunder Thighs?"


In the end . . .

. . .  my motivation for losing weight is certainly not in how many compliments 
       I can garner.   (because clearly I would have lost all motivation a few months ago)

. . .  I am glad that those closest to me have noticed.
       (my dear husband, sweet Hosanna, always complimentary Kayla, 
        and a few Sweet Friends)

. . .  my motivation comes from the desire to take care of the body 
        that the Lord has given me, to live longer, and to be able to enjoy life more fully.



But . . .

just curious . . .

. . .  have any of you lost a significant amount of weight?

. . .  how much did you lose before people noticed?

. . .  do you have any friends that have lost a significant amount of weight?

. . .  at what point did you notice?

. . .  did you say anything?

. . .  if not, why not?