How Do You Define Success?

Some people have very specific definitions

for their  "Success" in life :

Getting Straight A's  =  Success

Winning the State Track Meet  =  Success

Raising All of their Children to Love the Lord  =  Success

Losing 100 Pounds  =  Success

And . . . 

I would agree that every one of those things does  =  Success

However . . .

can we not be successful if we don't reach each of those ultimate goals?

What if we have a 3.87 Grade Point Average?

What if we get 10th place in the State Track Meet?

What if some of our children walk away from the Lord?

What if we only lose 50 pounds, when we need to lose 100?

Does that mean that we are "Unsuccessful" ?

Succeed:  To accomplish something attempted; to do well.

Success:  The achievement of something attempted.

Successful:  Having succeeded; having reached one's goal.

Some people would be disappointed with a 3.87 GPA,

because their goal was to get a 4.0.

Some people would be disappointed with a 10th place at State,

because their goal was 1st place.

Some people would be disappointed if each of their

children wasn't living up to their every expectation.

Some people would be disappointed if they only lost 50 pounds,

and their goal was 100.

   And . . . 

I get that.  

I understand.

But . . .

I want us to focus on the fact that

maybe our goals should be less rigid . . .

maybe our goals need to be re-defined . . .

maybe our goals need to focus on the long-term.

In June . . . 

I set out to lose 100+ pounds.

I have not yet reached that goal.

However . . . 

I HAVE been successful.

I am EXCITED about the "Success" of losing 50+ pounds already.

I still have 50+ pounds that I want to lose.

I get a little frustrated when the scale gets STUCK for a month.

But . . .

I have already been "Successful".

I cannot beat myself up just because 

it is taking a little longer than I had hoped.

I almost didn't post the following picture.

I can get hung up on the hips that are still wide.

Sadly, these side-by-side shots don't really seem like 50 pounds difference.

But . . . 

it's all in perspective.

The hips may seem just as wide . . . 

the jeans just as tight.

But . . . 

what doesn't show is that the jeans are 3 sizes smaller . . .

the shirts are a smaller size.

What doesn't show is that I've lost . . .

6" off my Chest

9" off my Waist

9" off my Hips

Yes.

I still have a lot to lose.

    But . . .

this IS "Success".

Do we need to look at our goals from a different perspective?

Do we need to be THANKFUL for each little step forward,

even if we are still a long ways off from the Finish Line?

If we got a 3.87 GPA . . . 

can we be thankful that we worked hard and did well?

If we got 10th in State Track . . . 

can we be proud that we ran our best?

If we raised up our children to love and serve the Lord . . .

can we know that we did our very best,

and trust the Lord for the "success"?

If we have lost 50 pounds . . .

can we get EXCITED . . .

and keep working hard to lose the rest?

I got an email last week from one of you Blog Readers,

which in part said,

"Please remember that pounds don't measure good or bad.  

Who you are in God's sight doesn't change as the window 

on the scales shows higher or lower numbers.  

Don't let numbers define your value as a person."

Absolutely.

I agree 100%.

And . . .

to tell you the truth . . .

I don't feel at all bad about this "before" picture.

Even at 100+ pounds overweight . . .

I was a confident wife, mother, friend, and Daughter of the King.

My value as a person is NOT defined by the numbers on the scale.

However . . .

in the midst of ALL of the CHAOS of my life the past few years . . .

as we have walked through crisis, after crisis, after crisis . . .

I have begun to feel of less worth . . .

of less value.

Yes.

I have begun to believe the lies of the enemy,

as he has whispered in my ear so many times,

"You are a failure.  A total 100% failure."

No.  I did not define myself by my weight;

but I did define myself as "a failure" . . .

as  "unsuccessful" as a mother.

And . . .

by being able to "take the bull by the horns" in the area of weightloss . . .

I have felt more confident as I faced the other challenges in my life.

It is not the lost weight that makes me more confident.

It is not the "before" and "now" pictures that makes me more confident.

No.

It is the "success" of setting goals, working hard, and reaching goals.

It is the "success" of resisting temptation as I bake goodies for the family.

It is the "success" of telling myself, "I can do this." . . . and doing it.

Each of these "successes" have helped me to push away

the label of "You are a failure." that I had begun to believe.

Each of these "successes" have given me new strength

(both physical and emotional)

to face the every day challenges that I face.

As I have been "successful" in my weightloss . . .

I have begun to hear the Lord's whispers,

"I love you.  You are beautiful.  You are worthy.

You are a great mother.  You are the woman I designed you to be."

(I know the Lord was telling me this before losing weight;

I know that He does not define my value by the number on the scale;

but sometimes we don't always hear His voice very clearly.)

Yes.

I must re-define success.

Even if my body never resembles the athletic 20 year old I once was . . .

(before 11 pregnancies . . . cancer . . . endometriosis . . . the car accident)

I have lost 50 pounds . . . and that = Success.

I hope to lose 50+ more pounds . . . and that, too, will =  Success.

Even if my marriage is never perfect . . .

(because 2 imperfect people do not = perfect)

Jim and I have been married for 30 years . . . and that = Success.

We hope to be married 30+ more years . . . and that, too, will = Success.

Even if I do not have "perfect" relationships with each of my 12 children . . .

(because 1 imperfect mother + 12 imperfect children do not = perfect)

I have REALLY GOOD relationships with 1/2 of my children . . . and that = Success.

I pray that the Lord will restore the other 1/2 . . . and that, too, will = Success.

The world may not define me as "Successful".

I am still 50 pounds overweight.

My marriage still has its challenges.

I have a daughter living in a Residential Care Facility.

Some of my young adult children are pretty unhappy with who I am.

But . . .

God does not call us to perfection; 

He calls us to obedience . . .

He calls us to commit our ways to Him . . .

He calls us to seek Him in every area of our lives . . .

He calls us to trust Him for the outcome of our challenges.

"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

Proverbs 16:3

I have committed my weightloss goals to the Lord.

I have committed my marriage to the Lord.

I have committed my children to the Lord.

"As long as (the king) sought the Lord, God gave him success."

2 Chronicles 26:5

I have sought the Lord for my weightloss.

I have sought the Lord for my marriage.

I have sought the Lord for my children.

Now . . .

I am trusting the Lord for Complete Success in each of these areas.

I am trusting the Lord to give me His goals for each of these areas.

I am trusting the Lord to show me His definition of success for each area.

How do YOU define success?

Are their any areas that you need to look at from a different perspective?

Are there any areas that you need to commit to the Lord?

Are there any areas that you need to seek the Lord in for His definition of success?

* * * * * * * * * *

Guess what?  Guess what?

After 7 months of significant weight lost . . .

the first Two Church Ladies noticed this week.

I just smiled,

"Yes.  I've lost weight.  I've been working on it."